Skipping out on Cab Fare

this is a pre-Deck story.

went to a sox game a few years ago and after the game, the vendor (who sponsored the outing) uses his corporate card to unlock Finnie's Wilde Ride...

we left the pool hall we were at and went to a bar that was horrible. my coworker and i are trying to wrap up the night asap since we have to be at work at 8am, the vendor wont let the night end on a downbeat. so we go looking for a bar that does exist but because our cabby doesnt speak much English, we end up circling in the same neighborhood for an hour. this gets old real quick, we give him very specific instructions to get on the highway and take us to our final destination 45 minutes away. the vendor is livid and says "there is no way i am paying for that first hour of this ride." my coworker and i agree with this fundamentally-sound argument, assuming he was going to pay for this next leg of the journey...

we get to our destination, i exit the cab and walk to my truck after saying goodnight to my coworker and the vendor. i start my truck, the vendor knocks on my window. i roll it down and he says "i need a ride back into town and im not paying that guy!" i consider this statement for a moment, (admittedly i should have declined but being young and impetuous) i quickly state "get in!"

~side story~
i consider myself a good driver. one with the usual credentials, lots of practice and a destructive need for competition. i have been driving 5-speed standards since i was 14, my dad has a realistic driving simulator and is a huge racing fan, Red Pop had a go-kart and a dirt track through the trees i would race around in at age 10 (1 time, i hit a tree, my dad started yelling about driving too fast, its his turn to race the Kart and he smashes into that same tree. i learn about irony) i have driven cars with lots of power (my truck doesnt have very much), and i have seen the Dukes of Hazzard+Smokey and the Bandit enough times to realize that the good drivers always get away. this being the first time such an opportunity has arisen and me being out of money, i was naturally willing to throw my hat in the ring~

the vendor is in and the cabby looks confused. the traffic light changes like the christmas tree at a dragstrip, i fly out of the box, no spinning tires, just whatever horsepower my truck can yield and make the left out of the lot. i receive the next set of greenapples as i make the right onto the on-ramp. in my rearview, i see the cabby's headlights shudder for a moment and i accelerate. the darkness starts to close in as i extend my lead and my heart is slamming around in my chest. after 1 mile, i have come to an exit and i hop off. i take a quick left and another immediate left into a driveway to hide behind a fence.

with the engine turned off and my feet on the floorboards, the beacons giving away our location are doused and there is quiet. this is when i remember i have a passenger, the vendor looks at me with shock and speaks for the first time. he just says "that was awesome" we exchange a quick laugh until i see those headlights turn the corner, the cabby is an apt adversary and had sniffed us out. i crank the engine, throw the truck in reverse, whip the front end around and continue down this road for a minute before i take the next right.

we pass the street sign on the corner and i see my old friend: Dead End. i have about a 5 car-length lead on the cabby as i make the turn and disappear around the corner. it was time for something drastic. i tell the vendor to hold on, quickly pull a 3-point turn and get my truck screaming back to the intersection to take the left onto the same road the cabby is pursuing me. i hit the corner simultaneously with the cabby. we make eye contact, his jaw drops and i blow his doors off as my pace increases. we have exited the neighborhood and are traveling down the highway in no time. finally we have escaped.

we get to the vendors hotel, say a quick goodbye and i head home. then the paranoia sets in. i have thoughts like "cabby must have gotten my plates", "the cops are enroute to my residence" and "they will definitely be waiting at work for me in the morning". in the morning though, there are no cops and no cabby at the office. (guess the cabby must have just had a slow night and was looking for something to do for awhile.) my coworker is in before me and he stares at me wildly because has spoken with the vendor. the only thing that was ever said about that night in the office was my coworkers comment "hey buddy, heard you should be running moonshine in the sticks!"

note: no cabbys were harmed in the creation of or in the retelling of this night. furthermore, i will be more than happy to hand over my 3rd of ride to the final destination, should i cross paths with this cabby again...

~Life is Short, but dont be so Naive to think the Bad stuff cant happen to you while you are Gettting into it~